My children inspire me to greatness and when I take time to listen to them, they provide me with the greatest treasures any man could ask. I was taking some time to spend with my kids before bed to play train, wrestle, and have dance time when I heard my daughter, Alyvia tell mom, “I like hanging out with Dad, I want to hang out with him more.” I thought to myself, how precious this time I have with my kids. I only have their childhood once and then it is gone.
A lot of us miss out on the small special moments of our child’s lives. I am not talking about those grand moments where they first learn to speak, walk, ride a bike, or go to school. I am talking about the tiny nuggets that you find with a day to day relationship, where you carve out quality time to spend with your family.
Increase the quantity of quality time you spend together.
As our kids grow older it becomes more difficult to spend quality time together as everyone’s schedules become hectic with school, sports and work.
It’s moving fast.
We will never have more of it than we already have.
So the issue is not how do we get more,
but how do we become more intentional about what we have?
How can we manage our time strategically to parent beyond our capacity?” (Carey pg. 120)
Rhythm in your home actually shapes your family values
The rhythm of a song keeps it going and all the instruments in sync. If you cannot feel the rhythm then you cannot join in on the song. The great thing about rhythm is that if you know it and feel it, you do not need to think about it to make great music, it becomes instinct.
“Rhythm helps us establish what is acceptable and what is not acceptable, it determines what gets talked about and what doesn’t get talked about. Rhythm silently but significantly communicates value.”
Good China vs Everyday plates
When you got married you more than likely received a set of China, dishes that you would never use except during Christmas and Easter. You might also have received a set of Corelle everyday dishes that do not break or crack. In the rhythm of life you are more likely to use the Corelle plates than the nice China. The authors of Parenting Beyond your Capacity use this illustration to show us how our families create a rhythm to talk about God. Is our faith like the China dishes only coming out during holidays or is it like everyday dishes?
How to create a healthy spiritual rhythm
You should have meaningful discussions at key times everyday. Here are some opportunities that we take for granted that are already built into the family rhythm:
Eating meals together
Walking or traveling together
Tucking your child into bed
Getting up in the morning
Here is a helpful chart to show you how this can work:
Next week I will go into more detail of how to create your family rhythm and why it is so important.